Conversations around things like racial justice, reproductive rights, feminism, or fat phobia might be uncomfortable for you. Often we silence ourselves and opt out of these conversations because of a lot of different reasons. We might feel ignorant about the subject, or be wary of accidentally causing harm to someone. […]
Category: fear
The Illusion of Disaster
Many times we look at failure and see utter ruin. We’re homeless, starving, humiliated and abandoned by our friends and family. All from not having a project ship on time. Or getting fourth place in the Olympics. Fear has caused us to overemphasize the doom that awaits us failing, so […]
A Valentine’s Day Hate Crime
Not sure if you’ve heard, but there’s an uptick in violence and harassment against Asian/Americans. It’s not surprising to me, given that my younger brother was assaulted walking home from school after 9/11 with shouts of “remember Pearl Harbor,” an entire generation of my family was shipped off to internment […]
Barbarians at the Gate
It’s straightforward, if not easy, to deal with barbarians outside the gate. External enemies are easy to deal with – after all, they’re not us. It is much more challenging, however, if the barbarians are inside of the gate, as now we’re vulnerable and don’t have a wall to protect […]
Doomsayers and Gloomsayers
You may be familiar with the Doomsayer, the prophet who preaches about the end of the world, screaming into the void with their sandwich-board sign on their chest and a wild look in their eye. But there are also the lesser-known Gloomsayers, those who spread doubt, unrest, and complaints around […]
Outcasts
Outcasts are often outcast not because of hate or jealousy, but because of fear. Outcasts question the status quo, reimagining what could be, as opposed to settling for what is currently. They push against norms, innovating new ways of being and taking the risk of having other people dislike them. […]
My Dog Oskar
A quick story about a boy and his dog. When I was younger, my family adopted a dog who had been abandoned in the Northern California floods in the late 90’s. Oskar loved people, but whenever he’d see my grandmother (who lived with us) he’d back into a defensive position […]
Empathy vs. Sympathy
To have empathy for someone is really being able to really see this other person and understand why they might have acted or said what they did. While it might not be logical to you given your background, it might actually be logical considering this other person’s specific background. It’s […]
Sandbagging
Sandbagging is when you lower your performance at an evaluation so that you can compete with those less skilled than you. It’s a cowardly practice that one engages in when winning becomes more important than trying one’s best. It’s believing that the end goal is more important than the process […]
Elephants – Part II
We often use the metaphor “elephant in the room” to describe something that everyone is aware of, but no one is willing to directly confront. Whether that’s your uncle’s obvious alcoholism at the holiday celebration, or the fact that the company values don’t align with the behavior of managers, it’s […]